At our Morning Worship in Walmsley Parish on Sunday 20 July, we were delighted to welcome Valerie Skinner, Reader from St. Peter’s, Belmont, who gave a brilliant talk about the sisters Martha & Mary at both the 9.30am service at Christ Church Walmsley and the 11am Service at St. Andrew’s, Bromley Cross.
Thank you, Valerie – we look forward to welcoming you again.
At the Home of Mary and Martha : Luke 10.38 – 42
Father, may these spoken words be faithful to your written word and lead us all to the living Word, Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen
The day after I knew what the reading was for this morning’s talk, the following passage came up in my daily reading and meditation. It’s an account of an incident that took place in a church group meeting that Joyce Huggett was at and it went like this:
“I remember reading with a group the account of the healing of the woman who had been bleeding for 12 years. We tried at first to visualise the scene: the pressing crowd, that poverty-stricken woman, and Jesus. We then tried to put ourselves into the scene and to become the sick woman whose need to touch the hem of Jesus’s garment was so urgent. As much as our imaginations allowed, each of us felt the hot sweaty bodies of the crowd jostling Jesus and identified with the desperation that woman must have felt; in our own time and manner, each of us stretched out a hand and touched the bottom of Jesus’s robe. And each of us saw Jesus turn, heard him ask that curious question, ‘Who touched me?’, basked in his acceptance and allowed ourselves to be drawn to him. But one member of the group described rather tearfully how she had spent the entire meditation wondering how she could carry a sick friend to Jesus. When she heard other members of the group relate how Jesus had touched and spoken to them, she felt envious. ‘That’s typical of my life at the moment,’ she admitted. ‘I’m so busy caring for others that I don’t give Jesus a chance to care for me.’”
If we look back at the reading we heard this morning about Jesus at the home of Martha and Mary, you must be able to catch why I was jolted into seeing something of what Martha might have felt when it was all over. Let’s just remind ourselves what we heard from Luke’s gospel.
Jesus, and His disciples, had come to Bethany, a village where a woman named Martha, the sister of Mary and Lazarus, opened her home to them. Martha quickly became overwhelmed with her attempt to single-handedly fulfil the responsibilities of hosting more than a dozen famished men. Her sister Mary must have been well aware of the cultural norms of hospitality but, instead of helping Martha, Mary chose to sit at feet of Jesus, listening to His teaching. Martha suddenly interrupts Jesus’ teaching and she asks Him to make Mary help her, to which Jesus responds with a gentle yet profound rebuke. ‘Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted. There is need of only one thing, Mary has chosen the better part which will not be taken away from her.’
I’ve heard a few sermons on this passage, and they always seem to conclude with the advice to “be a Mary, not a Martha.” Or “Martha bad. Mary good.” Now, I’m not contradicting Jesus here. Martha got it wrong—that time. But it doesn’t follow that Mary was a better person, or a more devoted follower of Jesus. As you’ve probably already realised, I have a lot of sympathy for Martha. But on another occasion, Jesus was told that Lazarus, Martha and Mary’s brother, was poorly to the point of death. Instead of going to the aid of his friend Lazarus, Jesus delays. When he finally does start on his way to Bethany, Lazarus has already died. The moment she learns that Jesus is nearby, Martha, the woman of action, rushes from the village to find Him. In the midst of her grief, she is the first to make a remarkable statement of deep faith: “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. Even now I know that whatever you ask of God, God will give you’”.
Where is Mary? In the house, mourning. She doesn’t come to Jesus until he calls for her. She isn’t there to hear one of Jesus’s most remarkable claims about himself, “I AM the resurrection and the life; he who believes in me will live even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die.” And then Martha’s wonderful confession of Christ follows – ‘I believe that You are the Christ, the Son of God who was to come into the world.’ Mourning is not a sin. Neither is housework. I’m not highlighting these events to turn people against Mary in favour of Martha. We learn that both were devoted followers of Christ. We learn that neither of them was perfect.
Martha is a “doer.” She has a take-charge attitude, and she will do whatever needs to be done. But when the chips are down and there’s nothing left to do, she knows that she can turn to Jesus. She loves to serve others—we see her three times in the Gospels, serving every time. She speaks her mind. Martha is dependable. If you need Martha to be somewhere, she’s probably already there, getting things done. And Martha is right on two counts. First, she is right about what women were supposed to do during a household visit. In the Middle East, hospitality was (and is) an important value, and women were primarily responsible for that generous hospitality always shown to visitors. Imagine how much more intense this pressure to show hospitality must have felt when your guest is the famous rabbi who performs miracles, teaches with extraordinary wisdom, and appears to be the Messiah himself?
Martha is also right – in one way – in not doing what Mary was doing: Mary was sitting “at the Lord’s feet listening to what he was saying”. The laws of the time meant that women were certainly not welcome to join a teaching session with a respected rabbi and his disciples — particularly when any domestic preparations were necessary. So Martha is right on two counts when she calls out, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”. I’m amazed that Martha gets to talk to Jesus this way. It sounds like she’s yelling a command. She seems to know that Jesus, though he is a famous rabbi and the Messiah, is also a friend that she can speak to as a family member. She has a trusting relationship with him that allows her to voice her complaint and emotions honestly. Likewise, Jesus has every cultural right to rebuke Martha for ordering him around. Yet when he repeats her name, Jesus validates Mary’s action of sitting at his feet and listening to him teach! That is astonishing. The disciples had to be shocked. Martha may have been speechless! She certainly isn’t recorded as saying anything else.
I’ve been struck this week by that double Martha, Martha – trying to hear how Jesus might have said it. Was it said crossly to shut her up? ‘Martha, Martha! Or was it said urgently in the way we speak when trying to wake someone up, in an attempt to get their attention – Martha, Martha? But Martha was standing face-to-face with Jesus when he repeated her name. I think it was a gentle, understanding, patient and loving – Martha, Martha. The repetition of her name is His mark of love, drawing her attention gently, urging her to listen more earnestly. When twice called, she hears. I was waiting with interest to hear the inflection that our reader this morning put on Jesus’ words and I wasn’t disappointed!
What about Mary? Mary is a woman of few words. She is not a typical leader, but she is a devoted follower. She doesn’t offer the kind of service or action that other people might do, but she does offer herself, and she’s capable of tremendously beautiful acts of worship. Do you remember when she brings a jar of expensive perfume, breaks it open, and pours it on Jesus’ feet, then wipes His feet with her hair?
We need both Marys and Marthas. Say there’s a death in your family. Mary will sit with you and put her arms around you while you weep. But you still have to eat. Martha’s the one who brings the casserole and walks the dog. Both of them are loving you. You need them both. But whether you are a Martha or a Mary, remember to look to Jesus, and follow him.
In our lives, it is so easy to get distracted by our daily responsibilities. Martha’s story is a gentle reminder that Jesus cares deeply about our well-being. His response to Martha was filled with compassion and comfort. He acknowledged her worries and troubles, and His words display an invitation to bring our anxiety to Him, where he exchanges our cares with His peace and support, and to find stillness and joy in His presence. This story teaches us the importance of deliberately looking for spiritual nourishment. Martha’s experience of correction from Jesus was an opportunity for growth. Jesus gives her the opportunity to shift from the immediate tasks to the eternal value of being with Him. As he pointed out… What Mary chose ‘will not be taken away from her’ but the meal that Martha was spending so much time preparing would soon be forgotten. God’s words are for ever.
Mary’s decision to listen to Jesus identifies the importance of building our relationship with God. This involves us in making a deliberate effort to spend intimate time with God, to sit at the feet of Jesus and nurture our relationship with Him.
I know I’m saying all the right things to you but I wonder whether you also struggle to spend intimate time with God, just as I do. I can happily read a few Bible verses with a short meditation every morning and often what I have read challenges or encourages or chastises me throughout the day. I’m good at Arrow prayers and I talk to Jesus all the time – whether it’s at the start of a journey by car, as I listen to the horrific news about events in our sad world or when I think about friends and family who are struggling with an issue and I regularly bring my requests and thanks to God in times of prayer. But I have to tell you that I was quite anxious when we were told we would be spending the weekend at Whalley Abbey in silent retreat before our licensing as Readers. How do you ‘sit at the Lord’s feet and listen to what He is saying’? I find silence difficult, especially since my husband died, and there is probably too much silence in my life. My mind is such a fidget and will drift away from my efforts to listen to God and I have actually received precious little teaching on how to achieve this ‘intimate time with God’. I remember being surprised and relieved when our previous Rector Peter Reiss started talking about spending time listening to God by saying how difficult he found it.
I can only tell you about what I do find useful even if it’s not always the answer. Firstly, for myself, I need notto have silence. Quiet music, especially Taizé chants, makes my mind become more receptive and calms the activity going on inside my head. Using well-known sections of the Bible reminds me of what God has done for me, how He upholds me daily and what He promises for the future. I particularly like Ephesians Chapter 1, some of the Psalms, like Psalm 23, and John’s gospel, and when I allow God this space and time in my life, I can reach those precious, still moments of being just me and Him together, just me and God together. I wonder what helps you. Do you speak to other Christians about it? Perhaps it’s something we should talk about more often.
This journey of deepening our relationship with God should be ongoing. Each step taken in faith brings us closer to Him and strengthens our ability to serve with love and purpose. May Martha’s story inspire us to ‘choose the better part’, and may we find joy and fulfilment in the presence of our Saviour. And in choosing what is better, as Mary did, may we find the strength, wisdom, and peace to serve others more effectively and joyfully.
